Friday, June 01, 2007

Fred Thompson: The Cure for What Ails Us





These are reported little-known facts about Fred Thompson (from IMAO via Jonah Goldberg) :



  • Every night before going to sleep, Osama bin Laden checks under his bed for Fred Thompson.


  • Though Fred Thompson left the Senate in 2003, Harry Reid still hasn’t stopped wetting his pants.


  • Fred Thompson once ended a filibuster by ripping out a senator’s heart and showing it to him before he died.


  • Only two things can kill Superman: Kryptonite and Fred Thompson.


  • Fred Thompson once stood on our south border and glared at Mexico. There was no illegal immigration for a month.


  • Fred Thompson vows not only to win in Iraq but also to forcefully free Vietnam from Communism, thus giving America a perfect win/loss record for wars again.


  • Fred Thompson can open clamshell packaging without the slightest trouble.

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